Therapy for People-pleasing in Illinois
People consider you to be kind, hardworking, and approachable. You've spent years being the go-to person, always knowing what's needed and how to get things solved. However, now it's becoming a struggle to lend a helping hand or a listening ear. You no longer pride yourself on being useful. Instead, you cringe when you hear your phone buzz and dream about escaping to an island alone.
Want to Know How to Stop Being A People Pleaser?
You're easily empathetic. You often know how someone feels even before that person recognizes it. This attunement is a great ability but often hurts your mental health if you don't give your feelings and needs the same attention. Most of the clients at Live Lekko have a lifelong history of having their needs denied and developed people-pleasing as a way to build self-worth. Consequently, they feel responsible for others' emotions and believe it's their job to make others happy.
You want to be a good person and are scared by the resentment you're starting to feel towards others. You view this anger and this new need to be alone as meaning you're secretly cruel and selfish. But that's not the case. You're not selfish; this anger is a justified and healthy expression. This anger is trying to get your attention so you can choose actions that are better for you and your future well-being. Unfortunately, people-pleasing often leads to compassion fatigue, anxiety, burnout, and depression if left untreated. I hope you continue to pay attention and seek to stop people-pleasing.
Is Therapy for People-pleasing Right For You?
While you may express it differently, below are some common similarities of people-pleasing behaviors as experienced by my clients.
- struggle to say no
- quickly overwhelmed by the needs of others
- people-pleasing anxiety
- often replay in your mind social interactions from the day
- look to others to determine if you are doing the right thing
- preoccupied with not hurting people's feelings
- unable to relax until you know others are doing well
- defer decision-making to others
- don't share how you feel
- don't ask for help or accept help from others
- act unbothered even when you're feeling the opposite
- apologize even if you didn't do anything wrong
- find it easier to be agreeable versus stating your own opinion
Invest In Yourself With Therapy for People-pleasing
Therapy for people-pleasing can help. In treatment, we will look at the negative consequences of people-pleasing in your life and determine your motivation for change. Your caring therapist will teach you emotional skills that help you define personal values, goals, and needs. You will also practice acting on those values, goals, and needs. As a result, your self-worth and your genuine connections will strengthen.
Something that keeps people from seeking therapy and learning how to stop being a people pleaser is their lack of experience with doing things for themselves. As a result, they don't feel they can question their reality, say no to what is happening, and choose to do something else. Instead, they believe there's something wrong with them for having needs and being unable to keep saying yes happily. I understand these feelings well and help clients challenge these beliefs daily in therapy for people-pleasing.
Therapy for people-pleasing is an empowering process.
Start Therapy for People-pleasing in Springfield, IL
Do you have people-pleasing anxiety or one of the other signs of people-pleasing? If so therapy for people-pleasing can help you learn how to stop being a people pleaser. As an online therapist in Illinois, I can help you do this no matter where you are within the state of Illinois. In order to start counseling at Live Lekko follow these simple steps.
- For a free consultation call or text 217-402-7817
- Schedule your first appointment with an online therapist
- Start healing and stop being a people-pleaser
Other Counseling Services I Offer in Illinois
As an online therapist, I can give you a non-judgmental space for support whether you are in Springfield, Champaign, Peoria, or anywhere in between in Illinois. I provide counseling for women, anxiety treatment, and depression treatment. As well as therapy for burnout and stress, grief, perfectionism, and childhood emotional neglect. All through the convenience and ease of online therapy. I look forward to hearing from you.